The Happiness Project

I love this book. Of course any mention of goals gets me a little tingly. The author took one element of life to work on each month and set sub goals for each one. I am going to set up my 2011 this exact same way. I am toying with a month of quietness (listening better, meditating, etc.), a month of food awareness (vegetarian?), month of enlightenment (reading, writing, etc), nurture?, cherish?, remember (family history, personal history)?, limiting excess(weeding, no refined sugar)?

"It was time to expect more of myself. Yet as I thought about happiness, I kept running up against paradoxes. I wanted to change myself but accept myself. I wanted to take myself less seriously-and also more seriously. I wanted to use my time well, but also wanted to wander, play, to read at whim. I wanted to think about myself so I could forget myself. I wanted to let go of envy and anxiety about the future, yet keep my energy and ambition."

Ben Franklin's List: temperance, silence, order, resolution, frugality, industry, sincerity, justice, moderation, cleanliness, tranquility, chastity, humility

Gretchen Rubin's List: marriage(quit nagging, don't expect praise or appreciation, fight right, no dumping, give proofs of love), parenthood(lighten up, be a treasure house of happy memories, acknowledge the reality of people's feelings, take time for projects), friends(remember birthdays, show up, be generous), eternity(gratitude notebook, read memoirs of catastrophe, imitate a spiritual master), attitude(give positive reviews, find an area of refuge), work, play(start a collection), passion(write a novel, master a new technology), energy(go to sleep earlier, exercise better, toss, restore, organize, tackle nagging task, act more energetic), money(spend out - use what you buy, don't save it), mindfulness (create True Rules, Stimulate the mind in new ways, keep a food diary)

Wisdom: Don't postpone any task that can be done in one minute or less. When the student is ready the teacher appears. For both men and women the most reliable predictor of not being lonely is the amount of contact with women-time spent with men doesn't make a difference. Ben Franklin and 12 friends formed a club for "mutual improvement" and met weekly for 40 years. Read How to Talk so Kids Will Listen. Acknowledge the reality of peoples' feeling. The mere exposure effect: the more often you see a person, the more intelligent and attractive you'll find that person.